Little People Big Emotions
Recently, we have been experiencing big emotions in our family. We’ve had tantrums from anger, meltdowns from frustration, crying from hurt feelings, and everything in-between. It didn’t take long for my children’ s emotions to have all of us feeling a bit out of control. If you’ve ever struggled with your own self-regulation while also trying to help your little one regulate, you know how incredibly difficult it can be. I quickly realized I needed to get on top of these emotions quickly for all of our sake.
The biggest emotion that has come flying at us in a BIG way is anger. I don’t want my children to feel shame over their emotions; that they’re “bad” when they are angry. I want them to understand their emotions and I want this understanding to be biblical. I want them to understand that God gave us emotions and we know that only good things come from God. But He also told us the right way to handle our emotions. Emotions can move us to profound, wondrous acts. However, to be ruled by our emotions can cause irreparable damage. This is where I quickly saw a need for intervention.
After another meltdown before 9:00 AM, I knew I had to do something. I went to the table and began scribbling a variety of emotional faces. (quite poorly I might add). I cut them out and glued them on popsicle sticks. By this time my child was vastly curious about my activities and sat and watched. Next, I drew a heart and stop sign and cut those out. Once the glue dried, I showed him each of the emotional faces. We talked about how we feel each emotion in our heart and that any of these emotions can be the BIGGEST one we’re feeling. Then we really emphasized anger. We spoke about the things that happen that cause us to feel angry. We discussed some of the ways we’ve handled that anger in the past compared to the way that God wants us to handle it. I made sure to share that his emotions are not bad to avoid any shaming, but there are right and wrong ways to deal with our feelings. We even did a reenactment with some little figurines from an old baby toy to visualize what we were discussing. We ended with pretending that a ball, “Bob,” had angered him and role played different scenarios and how to respond in each. He was especially enthusiastic during that game. Something about calling a ball a “poopy head” and labeling it “learning” really got through to him.
This whole activity took maybe 40 minutes at the most from creation to completion and it laid the groundwork for the emotional regulation we are continuing to work through. I can reference the learning that occurred and at the start of a tantrum. I can hand him the stop sign and he knows exactly what I am asking him to do; to pause and consider his next actions. Were my drawings professional? Not even close. But they were all we needed at the moment. I have since created a more “formal” set of emotional pages to reference, but I’m the only one they make a difference to and I honestly think my children prefer the ones they watched me create.
So whether you have the steady strokes of an artist or the sloppy scribbles of a toddler, don’t underestimate your own ability to create in the moment. We know exactly what our children need. We just have to regulate ourselves in order to “stop” and figure it out. Some of the most effective learning occurs in the present and without perfectionism.
Please help yourself to the FREE download below to assist in your emotional learning lessons!
